Story: Experience

The Thoughts, emotions, and sensations of story.

Tacos! Wow! Yum! I’m full!
Like the experience of eating tacos, there are different ways for people to express what is happening for them in the experience of their story. People view, express, or respond to experiences primarily, but not exclusively, through one of three lenses … Thoughts/ Emotions/ Sensations. Communicating something of these in your storytelling helps to communicate your story. Listening for these as someone shares a story with you, helps you to connect with them.

The Thoughts, Emotions, Sensations >>

• Thoughts: “Wow! I reckon this is the best!” (eyes wide open) … “Seriously, I don’t believe there is a better meal to share with friends.” (assertive) … “Hey! All those amazing colours! All those ingredients! Agree?”
• Emotions/Feelings: Love! Love! Love sharing a taco meal with my friends and family! (smiles) … (smiling, licking lips, looking happy) … Oh dear, I’m a bit anxious about my heart indigestion later, (concerned look)
• Sensations: “Yummy yum yum! ooooh ahhhhh, I am so full!!” (smiling, patting stomach) … (frowning, patting full stomach) … “I’m just left with this delicious spicy tingle in my mouth” … (Burp) “Oooo, sorry … gastrocolic reflex! TMI?” (sheepish look) (smiling)

People view, express, or respond to experiences primarily, but not exclusively, through one of three lenses … Thoughts/ Emotions/ Sensations. With experience, a combination of two or all three may come into play. The more mature you are, the quicker you can interpret what you are experiencing to process and respond. Ask me how I’m feeling right now, and I will probably pause to think about it for a moment before replying. I can tell you what I’m thinking right away if you ask. That’s just me. In different situations, some people have a nagging in their gut, hairs standing up on the back of their necks, butterflies in their tummy, weariness in their bodies, picking up good, good, good vibrations, or other sensations. Sometimes it takes time to puzzle through this and turn these sensations into words that describe thoughts or feelings. So … what about you? How do you primarily operate?

For example, three different people can be standing together and be experiencing the same thing and, in turn, they will say, “I’m getting a bad vibe about this”, “This is not fair!”, and “This is making me very sad!” Probably same responses, different languages. So … who are you most like?

It’s why children sometimes look a bit silly if they can’t answer a question straight away, if at all. They were asked a feeling question instead of a thinking question. Best to ask both in slightly different ways and give the choice of which one to answer. For a group, asking all three ways might go something like this: “I wonder what’s happening for you right now? How does this make you feel, or what does it make you think about?” As you get to know an individual child, you may learn, in time, to ask the question in a way they have the best chance of answering rather than in the way you prefer to ask it.

So … what’s your preferred lens to experience or respond to the world? Thoughts, emotions, or sensations

This is important because it will help form the way you listen to a story (e.g. the way you ask clarifying questions) or tell your story (e.g. maybe adding extra perspectives to help a listener process what you are sharing).

Story listening [Thoughts/ Emotions/ Sensations]: What did you pick up? Thoughts? Emotions? Sensations? A mix? Do you need to ask some clarifying questions about what was said? What can you affirm or feedback anything to the person? Maybe they only reported facts in the early part of their story, so … would you like to respectfully ask what they may be feeling, thinking, sensing?

What thoughts, emotions, &/or sensations did you pick up, feel, sense in the story you heard? Or, from what you saw on their face or in their body language, what could you check? What did you assume from what was not expressed? What would you like to clarify, wonder about?

Storytelling [Thoughts/ Emotions/ Sensations]:As a storyteller, there are lots of options here. If you’re sharing with a friend, you may like to share the story using their ‘language’ and save some confusion. You may like to use your facial expression or body language to express some of this part of your story to an individual or a group. It’s OK not to share these because you may create engagement/ intrigue/ suspense. Or you may include an ‘I wonder …’ question. E.g. “I wonder if you can guess what is going through my mind right now, what I might be feeling, or maybe what’s happening to me right now?

What thoughts, emotions, &/or sensations did you include in your story? Some? If so, how did you do that? None? Why not?

Your comments

Because this is a learning community space, the task now is to critique the ideas &/or stories presented here.

• Use the comment space below to share your ideas, responses, questions, alternative points of view, or suggested improvements and reasoning.
• Share how you would use any of this appropriately in your context, with your skills, and in your style!
• Add below any of your own related experiences or similar examples of stories or ideas you have seen, heard, or tried.